I had my first ' Adult ' conversation with Edward today, its been a while since we both used our ' inside voices ', the saga seems to be about to end its course this weekend. I just ordered my new phone, will get an unlisted phone number, address is changed and my stuff will be either donated to charities or sold to fund my favorite Charity ( APLA ). I decided not to be the ass-hole ands let him keep the dog, which I really wanted...but I know that he would be in better hands with him than with me and my crazy life-style. The conversation got me thinking about how I felt about Edward, was it really love? or was I simply addicted to the pain? the exquisite pain of wanting someone so unattainable? Some part of me wanted to go back to him, but I couldn't, somehow I restrained myself and grew some balls, was I finally tired of going along and trying to be something I wasn't? I chose to walk away, and just like that I leave my universe holding the hand of my Edward. I managed to get untied, the end is here and I am finally free. What more could one ask for when one is free? Even though getting here has been hard, its a blessing in disguise.
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